3 years

looking some old photos, sweet and bitter, 3 years has passed. entering a new whole phrase of life now. People around me has changed. Some stay, some leave.
All i ask > does time machine can perform the magic that bring back memories?

Aquaria KLCC with my favorite person

I always wanted to go KLCC Aquaria and Petrosains someday since years ago.

It's kinda hard to invite friends to go those places, well, it's more to a children or family activity. That's why.

Anyway, I manage to con Amy Darling to go with me. 

It wasn't the first time for her, well she goes because she loves me. =p *perasan*

I feel blessed! thank you Amy.

Welcome to Aquaria!!!

first fish i see // Piranah // 

It's feeding time, food in his hand

Imagine what if you were in there. 

Bone

I'm amazed ! Check out the size of the fishes.

And they send in people to feed them. Just like a baby.

it's kind of funny to see him take down which fish has eaten. 

And how many each of them eat. 

at least I know she's enjoying the big tank

*mouth wide open*

HUGE stringray

ok la, i still having trouble using my camera. Mind being my tutor?

Jelly fish!

Of all the living fishes around, I have no idea why we took this picture. 

since a good Samaritan helps us capture this, so i think it's nice to post this. 

I think this is hilarious

Muak Muak

Not enough with the tank, we decided to go for a second row

i made her to pose with the thin little long limbs Monkey

know the reason? =p

Isn't she adorable? 

 We spent more than 4 hours in there.

I had a great day spending with ya! Awesome day out

Love you dear Amy

All about your heart

Mindy Gledhill- All About Your Heart

Mindy Gledhill, Kendra Lowe

© Blue Morph Music 2010 (BMI), Kendra Lowe (ASCAP)

I don’t mind your odd behavior

It’s the very thing I love

If you were an ice cream flavor

You would be my favorite one

My imagination sees you

Like a painting by Van Gogh

Starry nights and bright sunflowers

Follow you where you may go

Oh, I’ve loved you from the start

In every single way

And more each passing day

You are brighter than the stars

Believe me when I say

It’s not about your scars

It’s all about your heart

You’re a butterfly held captive

Small and safe in your cocoon

Go on you can take your time

Time is said to heal all wounds

Chorus

Like a lock without a key

Like a mystery without a clue

There is no me if I cannot have you

Chorus

Lyrics taken from http://www.mindygledhill.com/lyrics/all-about-your-heart.html


a beautiful song worth listening to. Enjoy

2011 Good Beginning

Few years back, I was really happy and cherish what I have. One of the reason is, I have this with me all the time.

 James 1:2-4  

        Whenever trouble comes your way, let it be a opportunity for joy. For when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be strong in character and ready for anything. 

Knowing every challenge I encounter will make a better me, strong in personality.

Everyone is my teacher. I was always in strong faith mood, knowing that I will be able to go through every trials.

And that was years ago, I did have great experiences and awesome adventures. 

I went to a bible study today, realized that I had somehow forgotten about this powerful verse.

And it shall be in  my 2011 resolution list. I can apply it in almost in my new year resolutions.

Here's my story,

Back to form 6, I entered a famous school in Ipoh, St. Michael Institution, aka SMI.  With awesome British structured building, cream in colour, beautiful red roof, world class toilet, food court as the canteen, perfectly trimmed grass field. Opposite to Ipoh old town. Who would not fall for SMI in the first sight?

Well, there was a little girl. It was her dream school even since kindergarten. And it is me! 

I stayed around the area back then, so everyday school bus will pass by SMI before my kindergarten. Because of the building structure that caught me, so I asked my mom to let me study in SMI. Sadly, I was told that it is a boy school. Realized that I am a girl, I will have to accept the fact. But it is a question I will definitely ask God when I died, "If You knows me so well, why wouldn't You make me a boy?"

p/s : I have other solid reasonsSSss on why I want to be a boy. Damn you if your guys. You need to be grateful on the advantages you have as boys. Hump!!

Anyhow, I manage to enter the dream school of mine for Form 6. Being raised in a Chinese and Cantonese speaking family and Chinese school from Primary all the way to Secondary, entering the English speaking school was a challenge that I had to encounter. I can't speak fluent and proper English but I prayed all the time. On almost every single time. Even in toilet. I prayed on other stuff also. Haha~ I know I'm crazy, simply because I just need the prayers.

Well, I stepped out from my comfort zone into a total stranger place. Many wonderful lessons were learnt and great people are met. People I will cherish and love for life. Best thing is, rewards were given to me.

All because I carried this verse with me  James 1:2-4. Some used to 'dislike' me but turn out we are now good friends. Stories definitely are in memory now. Some may hurt me, but I will love them no matter how.

I want to live by FAITH once more. 

 

Love must be sincere. (was reminded in today's bible study)

Be happy for your unhappiness. For they are here to shape ya. 

Romans 5 : 3

     Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance.

branches that meet

There are reasons why trees are separated.

Trees need space to grow. They need their own individual soil, water and air. 

To survive.

This is when patience comes in. Be persist. Be strong.

Longing to meet other trees with strong branches.

If it isn't. Some may freeze to dead.

Hello earthlings, I love you

Hello earthlings,

For this year, my birthday wish is simple.

I wish for a true happy heart.

And my wish has came to life. In this month, I feel so much better. I can laugh and smile from my heart.

I no longer cry in my heart. Sometimes dreams still haunt me. But I'm able to fight back.

See, I wish I can hug everyone I see. I want everyone around me feel happy too.

 Love is awesome and beautiful

beautiful pictures are from tumblr




With Love,
Carey

Untold Thought

grasping for air. Hell no. Not now. Not anymore. How I wish I can stay how i feel now.

I don't want to look back. Maybe, because it has helped to shape the me.

I realized I love and appreciate my family even more. Although time spend with family is not much, but I know I love my family and relatives more. 

Friends walk in and leave their foot prints, and leave. Whether is good or bad. I believe God had it on purpose. I used to care every single things(feelings) around. I used to get upset whenever people I love and care felt upset. All I care is to make them happy. 

But not now, yes, I would thought about it and I move on. Simply because I am making myself feel miserable.

After a camp with my fellow Christians. I think somehow God answered my unprayed prayer. 

-I never pray about my feeling to Him. Simply because I think He fails me.

So here it goes, 

I went to T.H.E. camp organised by UM PKV. When I first got a forms from a friend of mine, asking me to join this camp. My mind was like, do I really need this? bla bla bla

On second thought, why not, since I have nothing better to do. So here I went to this camp.

I totally do not enjoy the camp at all, I tried spend time with God, I tried to pray. Nothing make me feel better. So i went home feeling just the same.

Then new semester starts, my most important sem of all, it is the time to choose either become a recitalist or to write an thesis. Obviously, I want to be become recitalist, not because I like to play the piano that much, it is because I dislike writing a thesis more. 

Time goes by and I did not touch the piano much. I always went out to do something to make me happy. 

Sitting to play on the piano is a big NO for me at that time. I do not have the urge to sit and practice all day long. 

Well, when the recital hearing audition day arrived. I waited outside the audition room anxiously. I couldn't concentrate and it feels like hell for me. 

And the worst things is, I cried throughout the whole damn audition. 

Obviously, I screwed the damn audition.

So end of it, I failed the hearing. And I have to do my stupid thesis.

At that time, I am always angry with everyone. I am always sad. I see things very negatively. 

I had sleepless night, thinking of I can do better if none of the unhappy thing happens.

I even woke up in the middle of the night, and cry myself to sleep.

And I hide things to myself. 

As time goes by, I still have to move my right. (and this is what people been telling me, Carey, just move on and never look back) And it is all bullshit to me, how can I ever erase that and move on. Feelings is something you can's see. 

Well, I know this is the only thing they can say to me. People I really do you all care for me and I appreciate that. Thanks people.

At some point, I used to get myself to drunk and sleep. Sound freaking stupid right? Ya, I know. I have nothing better to do I know. 

Another stage I went to is thinking of dropping out school and start a new life. Simply because I don't see any reason why should do music. I am not talented and I to deal with people more. Haha~

Well, less than a year to go. So just do it.

So, another camp organised by PKV is here this month. And same feelings came again.

But I had the best moment for all this while. God had answered my unprayed prayer. I totally can spend time with God. Alone for him. And only had feeling for Him. 

I feel so much lighter. And I think I had my life back. For real.

All songs for me now is just pleasant music. whether it is happy or sad love songs would not affect my feelings nor mood.

I can now totally enjoy the awesome music, rhythm, arrangement and all.

How I wish I can paint them down.

Oh ya, I had my birthday with my fella campers in Cameron. It was a pleasant surprise for me. Because they suddenly off the light tricking all the campers that there is a slide show. Turn out some one came out holding a green birthday cake, singing birthday songs to me. I nearly cried, holding back my tears real hard.  The reason is of course I feel touched and another one is, I had a worst 21st birthday last year.

But anywhere, I felt happy because everyone and God is blessing me and there for me. 

Love you all. I appreciate everything you all did for me.

I learned and gained during the camp.

God definitely never left me endure with all this awful experiences without any plans. 

His timing is unpredictable. And I am definitely stronger now. I would say, I have a strong metal steel armor with me. 

My broken heart is back with plasters on. 

For the first time for a long time, I see rainbow.

For the first time for a long time, I smile, from heart.

I wish it is here for long.